Quiet Self-Action Leadership from the Silent Generation
Part 2
The Story of Fred & Marlene Hawryluk
I grew up in an age of unprecedented prosperity that was markedly different from the world my parents and grandparents inhabited (born 1943 & 1946 and 1899 & 1907 respectively). By the time I was born in the latter-end of the 1970s, the scarcity of the Depression and World War II eras—and to a certain extent the virtues they engendered—were becoming distant memories.
I was fortunate, however, to be close to persons who lived through those difficult times. Through their example, I was able to and observe some powerful lessons. In the memorable verse of Edgar A. Guest:
I’d rather see a sermon
Than hear one any day;
I’d rather one should walk with me
Than merely tell the way…
For I might misunderstand you
And the high advice you give,
But there’s no misunderstanding
How you act and how you live.
Once, as a young lad of 10 or 11, I went out to eat at a Chinese restaurant with my maternal grandmother, Ruth (1907-1992). I recall watching her take a single napkin from the dispenser, tear it in half, put one half in her purse for later use, and proceed to use only the other half throughout her entire meal. For a kid in the 1980s and 1990s, accustomed to taking as many napkins as I wished—and then inefficiently using and discarding them—I was surprised, and impressed, by this act. While I often heard my progenitors speak of leaner times, and their accompanying habits, practices, and mantras, they were never as real for me as they were for my parents and grandparents. Nevertheless, I always greatly respected family members and others born in the first half of the 20th century for the noble virtues they exemplified, and viewed their approval and praise as the consummate compliment of circumspect citizenship. While all generations have their faults, I recognized a deep well of wisdom within my predecessors from which I could receive upright moral instruction and glean life lessons. These models of modesty, fidelity, frugality, simplicity, and silent courage became my mentors, not because they forced their ideology on me, but because I admired them. I was motivated, therefore, to act in ways that would garner the approbation of my elders.
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| Fred, a part-time cobbler by trade, in his workshop (garage) |
When I met the Hawryluks over a decade ago, they had been in their small and modest home for approximately 40 years. Despite its size, I have rarely—if ever—seen a home so clean and tidy, or one that possessed a more peaceful and pleasant atmosphere.
Fred’s father, John, immigrated to Canada from the Ukraine in 1912. At the time, 160-acre plots of free land were available to anyone willing to work it. But upon arriving, John was arrested. At the time, the United Kingdom (including Canada) was waging war against the Austro-Hungarian Empire, which encompassed present-day Ukraine. Fears of cultural and political subversion from disloyal sympathizers resulted in the arrests of many immigrants at the time, not all of which were justified. After his release, he returned to the same neighborhood he had tried to start a new life in and bought up all the land he could. He was not rich, but he was industrious, and had an eye for opportunity. He worked hard and avoided debt.
His son, Fred, grew up during the Great Depression. Fred went to school in a four-room schoolhouse that included two outhouses and a stable for the student’s horses.
When Fred and Marlene got married, John gifted a small plot of land to his son. Fred bought a small adjacent lot of land for $285 and began building a home. Like the Piersons, the Hawryluks started out with very little. However, they were hard working, self-reliant, and frugal. Determined to remain debt-free, they patiently built their home as they could afford it over a period of two years. As a result, they never had a mortgage. They invested sweat, tears, and even blood (from minor accidents) into the construction of a modest, but very comfortable and tidy home. Fifty years later, they still live there. The Hawryluks also have a large, well-kept, and productive flower and vegetable garden. Growing their own fresh fruits and vegetables has saved them countless dollars over the course of their adult lives.
Canadian winters are cold (often dipping into sub-zero temperatures), and for the first winter they lived in only one room and used an outhouse. Fred wired the house himself after proactively seeking out lessons on the skill. Throughout the construction process, he would often walk to where another home was being constructed and observe how the builders were proceeding. He learned a lot from these observations, and managed to progress with his own home’s construction by working a step or two behind another home’s construction crew. Marlene helped Fred with much of the manual labor, including sawing boards.
Like Charlie and Muriel, Fred and Marlene have a large family that includes five children, 23 grandchildren, and 14 great-grandchildren. They taught their children the same life lessons that brought them success, and their children and grandchildren are, in turn, teaching those lessons to their children.
Fred & Marlene aren’t famous or rich—unless you consider wonderful family members, fresh and delicious fruits & vegetables, and zero debt as assets in their “portfolio,” in which case they are wealthy indeed. But the Hawryluk’s are happy, and you can’t put a price on happiness. In fact, they refer to their little heaven on Earth as the “Happy Hawruluk House,” or the “Hawryluk Haven.” Now in the twilight of their lives, they can look back on their long lives with satisfaction, contentment, and most importantly—inner peace. I’ve met a lot of monetarily rich folks who can’t do that. I’ll bet you have too.
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| Marlene at work out back of the "Happy Hawryluk House" in her and Fred's productive vegetable and flower gardens. |
